Barbed wire, a phalanx of Canadian soldiers, and a five-meter perimeter have been stood up to barricade the twenty 'leaders' of global Corporatism from their adoring citizens. Smiling protestors abound in the streets. Estimates are just now coming in from the flower counters. Keep in mind that these are just the initial results not yet independently verified. Our sources with the various ministries of communication are telling us that twice the number of flowers has already been thrown to the hundreds of thousands of cheering spectators lining the streets.
With stun guns, rubber bullets loaded, tear gas canisters readied, the various military, police, and private security forces assure us that they'll keep the happy crowds away from downtown businesses and our glorious leaders. Already, even before the official start of the festivities at the G20 summit thousands of "little people" had to be cornered in an alley by riot police. With so many enthusiastic people patiently waiting for flowers on streets not yet visited by the elated revelers the riot police moved this group back towards the main route of the festivities.
Containing the joyous mood of the revelers is going to be difficult because their excitement is reaching a fever pitch especially when they'd heard that the twenty anointed servants of Corporatism had arrived at their heavily guarded fortress. All of them great leaders, men among men, women among women, beloved at home and abroad; they'll all be cloistered in an undisclosed bunker so that they may work feverously to find new ways to help their citizens.
With the bankers already rolling in dough, military machines crushing those who won't follow the true path, multi-national lobbyists sloshing in gallons of champagne on Yachats the size of small cities, and all our friends in the many corners of Corporatism living the high life, the adoring global citizenry understands that not much more can be donated to make their elite rulers lives more splendid. But this shouldn't stop us all from doing our part by graciously accepting wage decreases every year so that the pockets of our masters are kept adequately bulging.
It's sad that the affection pouring forth from these loving citizens can't be shared directly with their master's handpicked rulers. Although everyone would have cherished the memory of meeting with their leaders they seem to comprehend the urgency of ringing more cash from governments privileged to be bound to the Corporatist Empire.
Everyone is also cognizant of the magnitude of the task at hand and would rather the brilliance of their leaders be totally focused on their duty towards corporate globalization. It's essential that the gifts continue to flow from the citizens through their 'elected' representatives, a firmer foundation be built, airtight laws enacted, and impenetrable bulwarks erected. Confidence abounds in those who will work the lobbyist hordes, those whose strong shoulders this honorable task has fallen upon, our great sponsors of humanity, these twenty specimens of perfection.
The feeling is effusive, there's not a proud citizen among the overflowing crowds of cheering believers that doesn't want to lessen the burden, and replenish the dwindling government treasuries that were opened up in an act of holy charity to party deprived bankers, businesses on the verge of dying, and all others who are special in the eyes of planetary Corporatism. That's why citizens from every region of the empire have been elated that their leaders have been making the hard choices that will usher in a better tomorrow for all those in the highest circles of Corporatist power.
By proactively slashing crucial government services to the "little people" these paragons of divine clairvoyance are at least beginning to balance budgets so that when our corporate masters need another infusion of cold hard cash it will be waiting, at the ready, within easy reach of their sweaty palms for the horrible sight of hard-pressed needy elites is just too painful an experience to live through once more.
Most citizens of this festive event when asked expressed in dejected tones that they'd have rather blown kisses, waved, cheered, thrown flowers, and chanted the sacred gospel of our blessed ultra-capitalist religion as their wise leaders sped by in a motorcade. But fully aware that the grueling schedule of their leaders demanded that they devour trays of delicacies and tighten the noose brought most back to their senses.
All our hearts are with them as they construct the perfect mousetrap - an airtight global gulag. For this every citizen is grateful, thank goodness the corporate masters had the foresight to install these impressive intellectual giants.